Day 332. Do you like worms? (28/11/13)

Today I finally bought the holy grail.

The Beach Boys. The Smile Sessions. The full 5CD, 2LP, 2 singles and hardback book box set of an album that was never released. An album that was never really finished in truth. Brian Wilson suffered a nervous breakdown in the middle of recording his follow up to the classic Pet Sounds. Drugs may well have been involved. Sod it, drugs were definitely involved. As was the pressure of fame, the competition that he felt with the Beatles to be the best on the planet, the mistrust of his fellow band members who weren't as appreciative of 'Brian's weird music' as his fans were.

Smile never appeared. Rumours circulated. Bootlegs changed hands, prospective track listings, stabs at how the finished work would sound.

And then, in 2004, following on from a wildly successful return to the live arena with a tour of Pet Sounds focused shows, Brian finished Smile and performed it live with his then touring band, the quite fabulous Wondermints. Grown men wept. I may have been one of them. I wouldn't care to comment on that matter.

It still wasn't quite right though; the vocals were performed by a 60 year old with experience of a difficult life not a 25 year old with the voice of an angel. Carl Wilson wasn't there. Dennis Wilson wasn't there. (Mike Love wasn't there but, ironically given his name, there isn't a great deal of love for Mike amongst either band or fans). There was still a desire, a need, to hear how this great lost album would have sounded in 1967.

In 2011 we found out. A double CD of the album and choice out takes was issued. It was, for a Beach Boys fan, utterly perfect. The box set was even more. (This is the point where J generally becomes exasperated with me) - pretty much every take ever recorded moment of every track on the album, instrumental pieces, false starts isolated vocals, studio chatter; the building bricks of an album that was compiled from small segments, the only map for the finished version existing inside Brian Wilson's fragile psyche. One would need to be slightly fanatical and more than a little obsessional to feel that you needed this.

Yeah, that'd be me then.

The thing is, I've owned some of this for nearly twenty years.

And that's what I'm really going to tell you about.

We had moved back to Liverpool from Leeds. I was working the counter in Church Street when a phone call came through from the stockroom.

'Ian, there's a bloke called Gary asking for you'

My head was completely in Liverpool, I wasn't thinking of anyone outside the city.

'I don't know any Gary's'

'He's asking for you by name'

I took the call. 'Hello, who's that?' 'Oh Hi Gary'

Obviously I did know a Gary. A very good friend from Leeds. Although he's not from Leeds, he's from just outside Glasgow, he just happened to live in Leeds at the same time that we did.

'Ian, this Beach Boys Smile CD? Which version did you want? The single disc or the double?'

'Gary, I have a feeling that we're not supposed to be having this conversation'

It was approaching Christmas. Gary was at a record fair in Leeds. J had asked him to buy this bootleg that I was obsessed with. He was buying it. We agreed that the double would be best and that we would speak no more of it.

That Christmas J gave me a carefully wrapped CD shaped box. I opened it and pressed as much shock as I was able. 'But...how did you get this? How did you know? That's fantastic!' In my defence the delight was 100% genuine.

Obviously the truth came out but it took about five years. We were visiting Liz and Gary in their new house in the hills above Salt's Mill. There was wine involved, there generally is on the best nights with friends, and somewhere in the night one of us (me or Gary) accidentally admitted to what had happened.

' I thought you acted odd when I gave you that CD' said J 'didn't seem surprised'

I'm clearly not the convincing actor that I thought.

It's hard to recall who was in more trouble for this, me or Gary, but what I do recall is that my wife knew exactly  what to buy me for Christmas and my friend, our friend, found it for us.

The box set, the full, more than you could ever need, works is fantastic but the important one? The important one is that first one.

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